Frieda L. Ferrick, Santa Rosa Counseling: Did You Hope You Were Going To Be Married Only Once?

A difficult loss for many is going through a divorce.  The questions that you could be asking are endless:

  • What happened?
  • Weren’t we supposed to be together forever?
  • Am I ever going to fall in love again?
  • What am I going to do with my life?

Let’s face it, going through divorce can feel devastating.  You might feel like a failure. You might be doubting yourself.  But there are questions you might want to think about to help you grow past this relationship.

It is okay to go through a grieving period; after all, divorce is not what you signed up for when you took your wedding vows.

So, what ‘s next in your life?  Are you always going to grieve?  No, eventually when you aren’t expecting it, something will pique your interest. You will be walking along and see something, and you will stop thinking about your loss and feeling your pain, and you feel your interest in life revive.  How long will it last?  No one can predict that, but you will start to have longer and longer periods of time when you will be back in your life.

Grieving the loss of your marriage may feel like the end of your world.  It might be a hard place to be in, but, over time, you will gradually start to feel better.  Don’t rush your process.  Everyone does this differently.  There is no right or wrong.  Some people start dating pretty quickly, and some people need more time.

If you are at the  point where it is hard for you to get out of bed after 6 months to a year, you might want to think about getting professional help.